Thursday, October 2, 2008

American with Irish Descent.



Eight years ago (creepy!), during my freshman year of high school, I had this crazy English teacher. Well, I sort of had two. First there was Mr. Falanga - and he gave up teaching during the first semester (and semesters were like 2-3 months each.) He was very nice, but didn't know how to handle students. Then, in came Mr. Bailey. Oh, Mr. Bailey. He was one of those by-the-book type of teachers. He didn't put up with bullshit, but at the same time he didn't know how to handle the bullshit either. At one point, he split me and 3 of my friends (Janine, Savage and I don't remember the 4th) into each corner of the room so we wouldn't talk. And one time, I said I missed Mr. Falanga, and he said the world famous quote, "WELL YOU KNOW WHAT?? HE BAILED ON YOU."

That was actually the second award-winning quote of a teacher yelling at me though, the winner being, "IF YOU WERE MY DAUGHTER, I WOULD KILL MYSELF." after being slapped. I'm not kidding, that did happen. In 8th grade. And it was because I was writing on the board - which was next to my desk - during his lecturing. I wasn't even that bad of a kid! Geesh. I mean, I only stole his pens ONCE. And talked back to him every chance I got. But seriously! Did that justify slapping a 12-year-old?

Anyway, the biggest lesson I learned from Mr. Bailey was through his grammatical correcting. I said, "I'm Irish." once and he said, "No, you are not. You are American with Irish descent." Which, is true. So, thanks Mr. Bailey. Wherever you are.

I have a lot of "Irish" traits though. But I don't like potatos all that much, unless mashed with garlic - and I don't like corned beef and cabbage. But! I am kinda crazy! I looked on a website today and I think being Irish is the reason for all of my problems. This very legit website - http://www.appleseeds.org/Being-Irish.htm - says that because I'm Irish:

Someone in my family is cheap (Hi, Mom!)
I am genetically incapable of keeping a secret
I'm not as funny as I think I am, but what I lack in talent I make up for in frequency.
One of my sisters is named Elizabeth (in fact, my only sister... but we don't call her that)
I have no idea how to make a long story short
I can't play basketball (See, Ev, there's a reason!)
I think I sing very well
I'm a poetic drunk. (Less poetic and more... apologetic and guilt-ridden.)

But, sadly, being Irish doesn't justify the reason I'm watching (and enjoying, might I add) the Real World Awards that is on right now. Or the reason I just finished the Twilight book series, made for 13 year olds.

Oh, and that picture above is about 3.5 years old. My hair was a brighter shade of red and I still wore a shirt that said "Kiss Me, I'm Irish!" which was later ruined due to dying my hair red and staining it with hair dye. Figures.

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