Thursday, April 23, 2009


Patty Barrett’s formula for curing sickness:

1 improv audition
2 sleeping pills
1 pomegranate margarita
1 spicy chicken dish
1 vodka gimlet
3 Advil cold/sinus medication taken too close together, potentially causing overdose
1 improv show
1 hot shower for 10 minutes
1 more sleeping pill
1 Starbucks coffee
1,000 glances at "hot guy"

And voilah! You’re just as sick as before, if not increasingly worse.

The truth is, sometimes I actually enjoy being sick. It’s a chance for me to take a break and stop running around crazy busy all the time. And I’m a restless person, so I have trouble justifying sitting down and watching TV or a movie, but when I’m sick, I have a reason – so I calm down a bit.

However, right now I don’t have time to relax and stay in bed all day. So, therefore, I hate being sick. I’m blaming it on fucking New England weather – the fact that one day it’s 60-70 degrees and the next it’s rainy and 50 degrees does not do me any justice. It’s either that, or God’s punishing me for my wrongdoings. Well, guess what God? I’ve done worse in my life! Eh, maybe.

I sound like Man Patty. Which is a slight variation on my usual sound of “Lesbian Patty”.

On the up side! Totes fun Leather Gang show & Lottery, and my crush is looking FINE today. Ow ow!

No comments:


Related Posts with Thumbnails