VEEEKTOORRRR

About a year ago, I "quit" working at IA as a manager (despite the fact I still worked) and I was replaced with Victor Yamboa, the new Filipino Patty. Unfortunately, on my last night, I couldn't work. I had sprained/severely fractured my ankle and was forced to lie on the couch the whole night while I helped Bryan and Victor co-manage. So, that was his first impression of me.

Lately, I've been spending more time getting to know him. He's a brilliant artist, a genuinely nice guy, and he's super funny. He's really quiet and respectful, and it's hard to be that down at IA. Everyone's personalities are so loud that it's so easy to fall in the background. I'm glad Vic's coming out of his shell! And I must say, he gives 5 and 2 like an old pro now. He ain't scared of NOBODY.

Evan and I were talking to him once about making a banner for our NXT show opener. Two days later, he had an AMAZING painting. I ran into him on the street and we asked him how it was coming along (assuming he'd forgot or didn't put much effort into it) and bam, he pulled out his sketchbook and revealed the awesomeness! He's so talented.

So, I'm directing you to his blog. Where you'll read his words and see his artwork. Trust me, he's brilliant. Also, feel free to make fun of him for misspelling things like "were" instead of "we're" OMG, what an idiot! (English is his second language.)

There's a cute little mention of drawing his girlfriend, and he says, "Good thing I'm already going out with her." I thought that was adorable. I haven't heard someone refer to dating as "going out" in a long time. I love it.

So go here! Vic! Vic! Vic!

Hip to Relax

This past weekend I was borrowing my sister’s Mac while she used my Sony laptop to take the bar exam. (Thank God it’s over!)

On Sunday morning, I woke up too early and it was too hot to lie in bed. I walked down to my favorite Starbucks that’s conveniently located 5 minutes from my apartment. I got my coffee (the one that is ruining my bank account) and I sat and watched Mad Men and scoured the internet.*

I felt so HIP. It’s probably the most cliché thing in the world, but hey – I’m a sucker for a cliché.

Not only did I feel “hip” – but I also felt extremely relaxed. I didn’t feel guilty because I was up, washed, dressed and out in the world with people (I have trouble relaxing and staying in because I feel like a bum). Some nice Billie Holiday was playing in there, Mad Men was great, coffee was good, the air conditioning was awesome.

I’m so relaxed when I’m being hip. I’ve found my key to relaxation! It was a good hour pre-rehearsal when things would get crazy again.




* I gave up internet on the weekends. I spend over 40 hours a week at work on the internet, so I try to cut back my time on the weekends. There’s no point really. I do check Twitter and Facebook on my phone (doesn’t count) – but otherwise, I live and socialize and relax! (Also, I don’t have internet in my apartment.)

Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood

Last week during the Midnight Show, we spent a good amount of time complaining about the North End. The loud neighbors, the drunk guys outside Pompeii, the rats, the North End pool guests, the slow-walking tourists who flock to tourist traps like Giacamo’s and Mike’s Pastry (both conveniently located next to me and across the street from me)

But I’d have to say the good outweighs the bad. While I might have a small apartment and a 4th floor walk-up, in addition to the above issues, there are so many great things about the North End!

*It’s the middle of the city – all the T lines are near here, I can walk to most locations in Boston in 15 minutes, not to mention it’s so convenient to all of my jobs.
*5 minute morning commute (to day job), 5 minute evening commute (to night job)
*No more drunk driving, just drunk stumbling.
*The awesome roommate that is Kiley Fitzgerald.
*My own personal Cheers that is Goody Glover’s (even though “Cheers” is within walking distance as well… but that’s unimportant) There’s something great about walking into a bar and having the bartender say, “Captain and diet, Patty?” Knows my name and my drink – good man. (And maybe that’s a little pathetic and says I drink too much. I don’t care.)
*Most of my friends live in the neighborhood, making my life even more like "The Hills".
*The smell of pastry and bread in the morning. (Best around the Bova's area)
*The woman who makes the fresh pasta in the window late every night on Cross Street. I like her.
*The UPS delivery man, Steve, is quite possibly my favorite person ever! He delivers to my apt and both jobs, and he always yells out to me whenever I’m walking down the street and he’s in his truck.
*Being within walking distance to the Boston waterfront, which is a wonderful place to go for a walk.
*The porch, which is the Rose Kennedy Greenway. It has become quite the hot spot for the IA folks: watching kids play in the fountains, lying out in the grass and getting sun burnt, drinking lemoncello and Arizona iced tea, and of course the gossiping.
*The prosciutto and mozzarella sandwiches.
*Afternoons at Café Lil Italy.
*I’ll even admit the old men who hang out in “clubhouses” all day, or in front of the clubhouses in lawn chairs.

I love my new little North End life. Much better the second time around. Now if I can just get Matt and Casey to move here too!

How to: RELAX.

I had a wonderful long weekend! I took Monday off, so I extended my weekend a day and for the first time in months I had one day where I had nothing to do. No work, no shows, no rehearsal, no bullshit. But, to avoid waking up in a panic over the fact that I had nothing to do and would be bored all day – I scheduled some things.

Part I: “Oh no! Your friend fell!”

I woke up early because it was too hot, but I tried to sleep anyway. Then Evan texted me and I decided to just get the F out of bed. I got ready and I met him outside, and we then proceeded to get manicures and pedicures!

Considering my Mad Men obsession, I got a pale pink on my fingernails. All the ladies in Mad Men had it, and I wanted to pretend I was them! Evan got nothing. I got a purple on my toes, and Evan got nothing. Although I tried to convince him to do a dark purple on his toes, or just one toe, so he could channel Prince. He didn’t.

Part II: “I don’t think the sun is working.”

It was hot, humid and gross out. Considering I never get any color because I’m holed up in an office, or a basement, all day and night – I convinced Evan to lay outside in the grass with me. I even skipped my face moisturizer in the morning because it contains SPF. We got a blanket, and we lied out for over 2 hours. We even did the whole “turning every ½ hour” thing and we felt the heat, but we didn’t see its result. So we stayed there. When we got up, we concluded the sun just didn’t like us and could do nothing for our skin…

Cut to three hours later when my skin was burning like crazy and I was so dehydrated I thought I might die. I had to sleep with a cold towel over me, and when I woke up – I looked like a lobster with bright red hair. Not a flattering look, but when it turns into a tan I’ll be awesome, as skin cancer crawls closer to me.

Part III: “You know it’s bad when you’re attracted to Pete Campbell”

The better part of the evening was dedicated to Mad Men. On my last blog post, I had only watched one episode. Well, at this point I have finished the whole first season and I’m on the second disc of the second season. I can’t get over how much I love the show. It’s so beautiful, and sexy, and dramatic, and funny, and entertaining. I just want to lie back, smoke a cigarette, drink some alcohol, and frolic. It makes me so nostalgic for a time period I didn’t even live in! Not even close! I was born 26 years after the year the show takes place in, but I’m so jealous of all the people on the show.

It was so bad that when I woke up, I thought, “Holy shit, there was a plane crash yesterday. I have to read about that.” And I then realized no… that was on the show… And Kennedy isn’t president, Obama is. And Don Draper… HE ISN’T REAL!

WHYYYYYYYYY!

Anyways, that’s my three part story on how to live your life on a day off. Pamper yourselves.

p.s. Mad Men yourself.

Mad About Mad Men

First of all – I’d like to start this blog out by preaching. One of my best friends, Jess, got into a car accident last night. Here’s what sucks:

- It was a cab driver without a license.
- She may have sprained her wrists and she just became a licensed Dental Hygienist, and her wrists are crucial!
- It was ON HER STREET.

But the good news is, she was wearing a seat belt and that is what saved her life. So, click it… or ticket. Or die. Just click it!

In other news – I’m going to come out and say that I’m sort of obsessed with beauty and fashion. It’s kind of weird. I spend a lot of time during the day reading beauty/fashion blogs, or shopping websites, or reading one of the 5 magazines I subscribe to (which also just has to do with my love of magazines.)

While sometimes I look like I put on whatever was on my floor, sometimes I carefully construct outfits. And my make-up collection costs well over $200. I’m not bragging about that, it’s a statement. A sad, pathetic one. God, I’m so poor.

But when I said, “I think I want to watch Mad Men.” Evan was like, “Oh, Patty, you’re going to love it. The fashion! The smoking! The drinking!” And last night, I watched the first episode… and well; I’m in love with it.

How come whiskey looks SO good when people drink it in the movies and television? The pour, the bottle, the single ice cube… it’s absolutely amazing. But it tastes so gross. And the smoking – I’ve never wanted a cigarette so bad in my life!

But, the fashion really did me in. When I first saw Joan and realized that she was the Office Manager (I’m the Office Manager too!) and had the SAME hair color as me, I was excited. And as I’ve been having a hard time figuring out what type of make-up looks good with this hair color, I took note from her and today wore the same shades. (Pathetic.)

I also did my hair like another red head because it was so pretty.

Oh yeah, and the plot of the show is actually kind of great. And the men are handsome, and the ladies are voluptuous and beautiful!

Man, I wish I could have lived then.

Just One of Them City Girls

Last night at Goody’s, Bryce and I got into a conversation with a newer employee at IA who lived in New Mexico her whole life. She had chickens and horses and knew everyone growing up in her town. She said that coming to the city is a culture shock, and even though she’s been here a year, she’s just becoming adjusted to it.

I never realized until last night just how “city” I am.

What hit me the most was the fact that she knew everyone in her school. I responded with, “If I knew everyone in my school I would speak 7 different languages.” It’s true!

Growing up 10 minutes from Boston is definitely part of the reason I’m whatever way that I am. I’d blame the city for my impatience, my ADD, and even my bitchiness.

A lot of people think I don’t like them. (And it’s probably because it’s generally true.) I start out either disliking people, or not thinking much of them at all. Then the more time I spend with them, the more I start to like them (or strongly dislike them). I find myself not trusting many people. And I’m not trying to be a bitch, I just… I don’t know what to think of people.

Lately, there are people on the House Teams that I love hanging out with… particularly Mike “TDH” and Ryan “Plaid” (in addition to my usual folks! These are just newer friends.) But sometimes I find it hard to trust people’s motives. Ryan naturally fell into the group – but Mike was hand-picked (I sound like such a douche right now). And when we started hanging out, I thought: “Is he hanging out with me because he likes the attention?” or “Is he hanging out with me because it’s making him more known at the theater?” or “Is he hanging out with me so he can get closer to Dan Faneuf?” These were the questions going through my mind, because trusting people is such an issue, when I should have thought, “Hey, maybe I’m just fun to hang out with!”

But this is all a part of being from the city. Your friends are your friends and they’re lovely, and your enemies are… everyone else! We’re all rough around the edges! In large groups we’re total dicks – constantly vying for attention, and one-upping each other. But one-on-one we could be the sweetest people you’ll ever meet! (Not me, of course.)

But, I do love being from the city. Ceri talked about clear blue skies and beautiful landscapes and how the desert is magical. That’s all well and good – and I’d love to see it! But to me, nothing beats being from a city where you can’t see the stars through the polluted air, a nature walk is a man made stretch of grass, and one of our most famous sites to behold is a giant neon Citgo sign.

Get My Swerve ON

When I was 3, I started dancing school and I didn’t stop until I was 14. For 11 years, I performed and I was all about it. I did tap, ballet, jazz, gymnastics, pointe, lyrical, and anything else I could do. I lived for dancing. (My favorites were definitely lyrical and tap) I enjoyed going to class every week, especially when I was doing 3 at once. And even when dancing school wasn’t in session – I’d be making up dances in my back yard. Once, my neighbors and I even put on a whole 2 act dance recital in a venue outside of our houses! We even sold tickets and made a profit!

So, it’s no wonder that I looked towards performing when I needed to come out of the shell I was hiding in for my high school years. Dancing and comedy are very different, but not really. I still find ways to dance in comedy – I add splits to scenes that have no business having splits in them. Here I am in an office, KAZAM – a split! And if it’s not a split, it’s a high kick. And with dance breaks, and dance fights, and constant movement – it’s like a well choreographed dance recital!

I’ve always been absolutely enamored with dance. I went to a dance show two years ago that Liza was performing in, along with one of Julia’s cousins, and when I saw the lyrical/jazz routines – I almost started crying. I was so jealous and pissed at myself for giving up. That’s probably why I push myself so hard with improv lately – even when I was ready to throw in the towel a couple of months ago, I couldn’t do it. I thought about it and realized how stupid I was, because at this point in time – I can’t imagine my life without it.

Now who wants to sign up for a dance class with me? Or at the very least – go to a stupid club and get their swerve on with me!? Ooh Ooh!

The Porch.

If you live in the North End, you've probably been to the porch a time or two.

Getting out at 12:30 on Friday afternoons is possibly the best invention ever. It makes the week go by faster, because you have something to look forward to. And Fridays fly by – and the weekends are a tad bit longer. It’s 100% perfect.

Last week, Evan and I got out of work. We have a Friday ritual which consists of eating sandwiches… secretly. But last week the ritual went up in flames and it wasn’t nearly as successful as it usually is. So, he got Chinese food and I got a sandwich and we took our lunch to the Rose Kennedy Greenway. We found Cavbot and we ate our lunch while we talked to him and watched little kids run through the fountains. And by “run through the fountains” I mean they were grinding their crotches against the fountains and it was extremely awkward and uncomfortable. They don’t understand why it feels good. I wouldn’t let my kids do it if I were a parent. Thankfully, I’m not.

It was really hot on Friday, so Evan and Cavan decided to jump into the fountains. They ran through them, and then Cavan got out. But Evan stayed. All the little kids came up to him and started messing with him, and he kept running through the fountains. Then they gathered around him, like a bunch of groupies, and started making fun of him, as kids do:

“You’re ugly!” said one girl, and Evan just laughed.

“You’re hairy!” said another, and Evan had to prove himself so he said, “Not as hairy as most!”

Later, as he “saved” the kids from their deaths (which meant they would lie on top of the water and when they moved, all the water would go into his face) he would scream “WHY!! WHY!! WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME?!?! OH MY GODDDD” over and over and over. One girl looked at us and said, “HE’S SUCH A BAD ACTOR!” It was probably the funniest thing ever.

An hour and a half later, I sat by myself in a chair as Evan played with the kids. The next day, we’d sit in the same spot and drink limoncello and Arizona Iced Tea and get drunk in the afternoon.

But that’s the porch for ya!

MASH

I long for the days when we were all in middle school and the only way to determine our futures was by playing MASH.

We picked who we wanted to end up with, what career we wanted to have, how many kids, where we were going to live, what car we were going to drive… it’s so funny. Somehow, that’s all that mattered. It gave me more hope than anything! Something to look forward to in this life. I was totally going to marry Brad Renfro, drive a Mercedes and live in an apartment. (FYI – Brad Renfro is dead. So, that’s not going to happen. I always fall for the drug abusers – I guess it’s an Everett thing.)

Well, I just discovered you can play this game online! Though it’s nothing compared to doing it on a regular piece of notebook paper during a boring Social Studies class – it’ll do the job for now.

And so it turns out that my life is figured out. I’m marrying Evan, we’re living in California, driving a green Lexus, and I’m an improv comedian! Go me! I’ll have to negotiate that whole 18 kids part – I forgot that’s what the numbers were there for and I didn’t mean to write 18. It’s just a favorite number of mine. Holy shit, no, I can’t have 18 kids! Please, no!

Here are some weekend notes for you:

- The House Teams start up next Tuesday night at 8 o’clock, it’s the premiere night of the new “season” and I’m super excited about the Leather Gang’s new structure and the whole show set-up as well!

- Everyone should relax this weekend. You’ve earned it!

- There’s a raging party for Kiley this Saturday night and it’s going down! We’re going to party into the morning light.

- If you’re poor, don’t spend all your money buying clothes you do not need when your closet is already way too full to fit anything else in there.

- Listen to the song “Can You Feel It” by Michael Jackson.

Superhero named Patty

Kyle: Patty, did you dye your hair?
Me: Yes, I did!
Kyle: It looks good, what color is it?
Me: Red.
Kyle: Oh, it looks purple.
Me: What??
Kyle: It looks reddish with purple in the light.
Me: Well, I’m also a superhero.
Kyle: You’re a superhero?
Me: Yeah.
Kyle: What’s your name?
Me: … Patty.
Kyle: You’re an improv actress and that’s what you came up with me? Think it over, and we’ll do the same thing to Matt -- Matt, did you see Patty dyed her hair?
Matt: Oh yeah, Patty it looks nice.
Kyle: Ask her what color it is.
Matt: I’d say it’s “auburn mist”
Me: Ooh! Kyle said it looks purple.
Matt: No, it doesn’t.
Kyle: No! Here’s what happened! Now, you know what Patty moonlights as – an improv actress – so I said it looked purple and she said she was also a superhero and then I asked what her name was and she said PATTY!
Matt: I actually think it’s kind of funnier because you’d expect her to say some crazy name but she ends up just saying Patty. Did you say it dead pan?
Me: Yeah.
Matt: That’s funnier.
Kyle: Whatever, Patty – HOW’S YOUR PLAY GOING?

Kyle likes to call my improv shows “plays”… so every time I correct him, he says “Nope. They’re plays.”

Just another day, being a superhero… and nobody gets it. Nobody gets that those crazy names in the movies aren’t REAL. In real-life superhero world, we all just have normal names!

I don't have a picture, so that above pic will have to do. Even if it's not real, that's sort of the color. And that may or may not have been the inspiration... here's what it's like on a real person!

Vote For Vince

My friend Vince signed up for a contest on Facebook called, "Make A Friend Famous" for Entourage. If he wins, he gets to be on a billboard in LA. Right now, he's in 21st place, but with your help - he could be 1st! You get to vote 5 times a day until the contest ends! So, you should help! http://apps.facebook.com/entouragecontest/?uid=17904048

Here are 5 Reasons You Should Make Vince Famous:

1. He is a fun guy, which is why him and I co-created "Team Fun". Team Fun is our office event planning committee. It used to be a whole bunch of people, but HR was like, "Nope, you guys are fun, we want to make it the two of you." So, if you think I'm fun (which, let's face it... I am) then you'd definitely think Vince is fun!

2. He has the thickest authentic Boston accent.

3. He went to high school with Matt Catanzano.

4. At the office holiday party in December, he sang "Ice Ice Baby" in front of everyone because we all filled out a questionaire asking what our theme songs were. He wrote "Ice Ice Baby" and then had to sing it. I wrote, "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks, and somehow ended up singing, "Get The Party Started" by Pink. Sure.

5. He just got back from Vegas! What's not fun about Vegas!

What's your word?

I could blog about my weekend, but that would be as un-interesting AS my weekend. No seriously, I sat inside on Saturday night in full “going out” attire unsure of what to do/waiting for something to do while watching a Michael Jackson E True Hollywood story… until Dibello beckoned me and we did together what I would normally do on any given weekday OR weekend night when I’m bored and alone… go see a show at IA.

Fuck, I just blogged about my weekend.

I took a personality test today that asked me to rank animals (cow, tiger, sheep, pig and horse) and then the test told me what my rank meant about me. I ranked them: cow, tiger, horse, sheep, pig – that meant I valued “career, pride, family, love & money” which is an awful selfish way of putting it… but it’s probably true.

My career is my number one priority right now… or else people would see me a lot more! I have to have a day job so I can make money, and I have to do improv because it makes me happy and I want do it forever! FOREVER!

Pride’s also major in my life – for many reasons. If you’ve read the book “Eat, Pray, Love” you’ll remember a part when she was in Italy talking to Luca Spaghetti, and he asked Liz what words were for different things. For instance, he said Italy’s word would be “sex” and New York’s would be “succeed” or “achieve”… I think Boston’s word is “pride” because we’re a very proud people. Even when we’re sucking, we’re proud of it. And luckily – I’m from here! So that means I get to be full of pride too.

I wonder what my personal word would be. I think about this a lot, but can’t narrow something down. I waste too much time wishing certain words were mine. Driven? Sure, I’m totally driven… when I feel like doing something. I’m too lazy to be driven. So, maybe it’s “lazy”. But, no, I’m way too busy. I used to think it was “responsible” or “mature” but well, no. Neither of those are true. Seriously Bent all but destroyed that for me.

I just don’t know, but I hope it’s a good word. I’d like to say “creative” but right now I’ll just stick with “hot mess” (The above picture shows this perfectly!)

Greetings!

I just had to call the Coca Cola Company for work – because our vending machine dollar feeder is broken. When the lady hung up she said, “Have a classic day!”

What is a classic day? I didn’t get it… until I realized that “Coca Cola classic” is their thing. Hate it.

I’m glad I only have to do generic greetings, “Good afternoon” and the like. I’ve had to write up signs before for our elevators and I had to write, “We’re inspired to meet you!” Which really doesn’t make any sense, if you think about it. So, I’m glad I don’t have to say, “Good afternoon, I’m inspired to talk to you” because, I’m not. I don’t know if this person is going to inspire me or not!

But, when I worked at Build-A-Bear workshop, I had to answer the phone like this “Thank you for calling Build-A-Bear Workshop, where best friends are made! How may I make your day?”

And the reason I probably got fired was because I didn’t WANT to make anyone’s day, and I certainly didn’t want to ask anyone how I could do it, because I didn’t cater to them. They were going to have their day made however I wanted their day to be made. Am I right? So, yeah, it was that… or the whole fact that children visibly annoyed me… when I was leading their birthday parties.

Phone greetings mess me up though. Every time I start a new job, I answer in former greetings I’ve had to use. I’ve answered the phones at AMP as “Good afternoon, Improv Asylum”. At Improv Asylum, I’d answer with the MFA store greeting. And at the MFA store, I answered in the Build-A-Bear way.

Yet, people still trust me to answer phones for their businesses. Maybe it’s because of my sunny disposition and welcoming deep voice. Maybe one day, I won’t have to be the “voice” of a company – and I’ll be able to hide away in the back of some office doing what I want to do without having to tell anyone good morning or good evening – and the only person’s day that I will be making is my own.

Fun, New Challenges

A couple of months ago, when I first joined Awkward Compliment, one of the guys would call notes we received “improvement opportunities” as a way of putting a positive spin on what is potentially something negative. Or rather, not negative, but not always that fun to hear.

When I was going through the training center, one of the guys in my class referred to them as “handicaps”… as in, handicaps we need to get over. We’re not bad, we’re just handicapped. Excuses!

My “handicap” is that I have ADD. Self-diagnosed, of course. But it’s my excuse for everything:

“Patty, why don’t you watch LOST?”
“I don’t know, I have ADD. I can’t sit through it.”

“Patty, did you watch that video I posted on your Facebook wall?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“I have ADD.”
“It’s 2 minutes long!”
“… and I forgot.”

“Patty, did you read that book that I --
“Look, a spider!”

For months now, I have been asked to listen to this episode of “This American Life” entitled “What I Learned From Television”. I keep saying, “OK, I’ll listen to it.” But then I never do.

So then when I’m asked again, I’ll say, “Sorry, I’ll get around to it…” but still, I never do.

Finally, one day while sitting in my apartment, I decided to give it a try. I realized it had been on for 20 minutes and I basically didn’t remember a word that was said. I was simultaneously writing something, painting my nails, staring at the ceiling, sorting through clothes – basically anything else besides listening to the program.

Today, in a hungover stupor, I decided to give it another shot. Maybe I’ll take on the challenge (in addition to things like not breaking in scenes and “keeping it together”) of sitting still for an hour and listening to this episode I’m apparently going to love. And, while it took me longer than an hour – I stopped it after Act 2 so that I could re-charge myself – I did enjoy it. It required a lot of paying attention, and I couldn’t do much else but listen because balancing listening to people talk and other things is SO hard!

But it put me in a mood of “I can do anything I put my mind to!” and then I was inspired to do other things I’ve been meaning to tackle… but then I got distracted.

I was given an assignment, or a “fun new challenge” to listen to another episode… and when I do, I’ll write about how I have ADD and it’s my excuse for everything but one day I decided to sit down and listen to it and how it inspired me to do other things, but then I got too distracted.

Until then!

happy 6th of July!

I love holiday weekends so much because there is nothing better than getting days off and getting paid for them. So on Thursday afternoon, I was released from work at 2pm and was paid to eat a long lunch at a nice Italian restaurant, shop at a North End boutique, and take a nap. On Friday, I was paid to sleep until noon, take a walk down to the Waterfront, go home to Everett for a few hours, and shop at Target.

Yup, rough life. But the one thing I hate about holidays is the pressure. Like, I didn’t go out to the fireworks, I had plans to but then they fell through at the last minute… so, instead, I sat on my bed and watched “How I Met Your Mother” until the shows at IA got out so I could meet up with them for drinks.

But, I miss the old Quote Board, so it was fun hanging out with the kids and hearing them say funny things that I would laugh at, and then write down, and they’d go, “Oh no, not this again!”

But yes, that again. Here were some gems from the 4th of July holiday:

"You dirty fucking slut, do not rub your wetness on me!" Brian O'Hara, while taking a picture and getting wet from someone who had just run in the Rose Kennedy Greenway fountains. Although, out of context it sounds so much funnier.

“So a couple of weekends ago, I woke up in this stranger’s bed.”
“It wasn’t a stranger’s bed, Brian, it was YOUR bed, you just didn’t recognize it!” – Kiley Fitzgerald, referencing the fact that Brian is a slut. Although the “stranger” he was referring to was me, and he was making a joke to rag on me about that time we slept together. I mean, literally slept together. He was under the covers and I was on top of the covers huddled in a ball scared for my life. But I was so damn tired.

“We’re the happiest Nazis!” Richie, after taking a bunch of cast photos and yelling out picture themes like, “Someone just said something really funny!” to “We’re all Nazis!”

“What’s her name again?”
“I think her name is Latest.” Jeremy, referencing someone’s latest squeeze.

I love me some long weekends, good weather, some brunch, some dinner, some drinks… some light shopping, some slight bankruptcy, some mental breakdowns and my cute dog.

I Did It?

Last night was my first NXT show: Lost in Boston, Or Something Wicked Pissah This Way Comes. And, although I didn't really have time to freak out (though I still managed to)... it was a whirlwind of fun, hilarity and confusion... that somehow ended up being the best show I've ever been a part of!

Ladies and Gents, this show is actually pretty hilarious. And I'm not tooting my own horn here... I really just love it. Everyone's so talented, there are so many good sketches/improv structures/songs! It's all just too fun to handle. But it's also a very tech heavy show, there's a lot going on with music/lighting/video/props... so, it was easy for us all to be a little worried that the shit was going to hit the fan and everything would mess up. And, surprisingly, there were incredibly minor technical mishaps - but all in all, the show was smooooth sailing!

I can't believe it has premiered. It's so weird. If my internal calendar is correct, as of this month I've been doing improv for four years. When I first started going to the Asylum, it was 2002 and I was sophomore in high school. Four years later, I started taking classes. And another four years later, I'm on a cast. It has been a pretty big dream of mine for EIGHT years. That's nearly a third of my life. And when I was sitting in Section 1, Row B... I thought, "This is so fucking cool." And some of the people on stage that night were in the audience last night for my first show rooting for me, and it was really sort of overwhelming.

After the show, I was elated. I couldn't believe how smooth and great it all went for an opening night. People were sort of taken back like, "What? It went that great on a premiere night?" and I know some people probably didn't go because they wanted to give us time to master the kinks - but after 3 or 4 preview shows, the kinks were already mastered! It felt really great, because I've never worked so hard for anything in my life. I've never been rejected and thrown down and vulnerable that many times before, and it's pretty unlike me to get back on the horse so many times. But I did it! Norm said, "You earned this. You deserve to be on that stage and you got yourself there, nothing was handed to you." And that felt so great to hear. I did this... for some strange reason, I just kept on going. From Level 2 Patty to House Teams to Seriously Bent to Awkward Compliment to Leather Gang to NXT... it has been a very trying and AWESOME four years.

It felt great to have the support of the people who I've been working for all these years to see me in that light. I really have grown up in front of their eyes, because I wouldn't be who I am right now without them... in some weird way. Man, how grossly sentimental! But seriously... it's a big deal for me. And I'm really proud of myself. Pat, pat, pat. That was me patting myself on the back.


Oh, improv, I love you.

So, you should all come and see the show this summer. Preferably on a night I'm in it. Huzzah! We did it!