Wednesday, April 4, 2012

The 5 Stages of Quitting Your Job

{this was the kind of professionalism that went on at my work.}

I’m leaving my job at the end of the week and since giving my notice, I have felt a whirlwind of emotions. I mean, honestly. It has been nuts. I've laughed, cried, squealed with glee, had panic attacks, nightmares, etc. For some perspective, I got this job out of college. Like, days after graduation. I had no idea what I was doing or what my goals were in life. And now, four years later, I'm leaving a place that has treated me well and there is no bad blood whatsoever. Here is the range of emotions I felt:

When I came to the decision, I felt excited! Yes! This was right! I had to do it, I had no choice, it was time to go and pursue my LIFE! 

Then… I gave my notice. And I felt sad. Like a DUMB idiot. I felt guilty for ditching my boss, who is wonderful and works really hard and could use the help. As I walked around and told everyone, I felt terrible and I regretted it. There were so many people I loved! Why was I leaving? What was I doing? This was stupid. I left the building and cried more in the sunshine.

Finally, relief came. Oh man! Sweet, sweet relief. I wouldn’t have to wake up and go to a day job and sit at a desk all day? I wouldn’t have to be everyone’s bitch? I wouldn’t have to greet another guest, coordinate any more travel or deal with people’s dumb questions? I would be able to sleep a little better. I’d be able to get more stuff done during the day. I could see movies during the day and maybe, just maybe, not have bags under my eyes.

Slowly, but surely, anxiety washed over. How was I going to make money? Who was going to take my place? How do I get everything together to train them? What if we don’t find the right person, or they don’t get hired in time and I can’t train them? What was I going to do about health insurance? HOW WAS I GOING TO BUY ALL THOSE WEDGES I WANT?!?!

Finally, I’ve settled on excitement. Or, nervcitement. I’m nervous to leave behind something stable and that treated me so well and that I actually enjoyed (for the most part)… but I’m also excited to tackle something new. The thought of having a little bit of time to myself and being my own boss is an incredibly exciting thought. I have my whole life to work a full-time day job… so, things are good.

Friday at 12pm is the first day of the REST OF MY LIFE!!!

{falls into canyon.... dies.}

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