(that's almost ten years ago upon first dying my hair. yikes.)
Hi Red Hair,
It's me, Patty. Your friend. It's been a while since we parted ways. I drastically left you, but you still popped your brassy little strands up every now and then, right before I needed a dye job... and now you're gone for good. (I think? I don't know. I'm being dramatic. You're not even a real person.)
You came to me when I was going through a tough time in my life. I was depressed, I didn't like myself, I was looking for a huge change. So, red hair was my answer. And taking improv classes. You made me feel like the Patty I was supposed to be! (And, well, so did improv classes.) I was a brand new person!
You stayed with me through many years and a lot of money and hair appointments. You were bright and clownish and auburn and sultry and everything in between. You were with me when I lost a bunch of weight, gained a ton of confidence, kissed boys, met great friends, bought too many dresses, drank too many drinks, auditioned for improv casts over and over, got rejected (and eventually made) improv casts over and over... you were a huge staple! You helped form my identity. "Who's Patty? That girl with red hair and glasses? Oh yeah, I know her. Kinda. Maybe. Eh, barely. Who are we talking about again? Do you like dinosaurs?"
But now, our long relationship has ended. I'm just a normal, regular, average, boring brunette girl with glasses... I don't stand out remotely in a crowd. (Thankfully.) I guess it was always destined to end at some point. For one, you weren't fooling anyone. For two, you were a god damn bitch to maintain. But... I will always think of you fondly. You helped me show my true colors. But now, I've shown them too much and it's time to fade into the background, with a lot more confidence and security in myself. All thanks to you, red hair! (And, again, probably improv classes.)
P.s. I'll probably see you again. I'm indecisive and whenever "Mad Men" comes back on, seeing Christina Hendricks makes me wish I was a red head again. Or, maybe it's just wishing I was Christina Hendricks, I can't tell. So, until then!
Goodbye To You (The Michelle Branch song),