Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Nine to Five

This week I’m working at my beloved old day job. So, I’m sitting at my old desk… doing some of my old duties… because the current Office Manager is out on vacation. It’s super weird! I’m not doing all of my old duties because when I was here, I had about three different jobs. So I’m only doing the actual “Office Manager” stuff. But it’s nice to sit here and make a productive use of my time and not sleep until noon just because I can.

There are definitely things I miss about having a full-time job. A lot more than I thought I would.

I miss waking up in the morning, getting right out of bed, making my bed and taking a shower.

I miss picking out an outfit and thinking, “When’s the last time I wore this? Did I already wear it this week? How else can I re-style it since these people see me every day?”

I miss getting a coffee on my way to work and then sitting at my desk and not doing anything for twenty minutes while “adjusting” in preperation for a full day of work.

I miss people walking by and stopping to chat about gossip, things they’re stressed about, funny ideas they came up with, weird thoughts they have, etc.

I miss people being around IN GENERAL. Days are long and lonely with just me and Edith.

I miss making to-do lists and scratching things off them.

I miss using my brain to start and complete a task.

I miss wording a business email… writing it, editing it, double checking for curse words… removing one or two curse words, but not all of them. Gosh, it's thrilling.

Not working during the day seems like the best thing in the world! You get to sleep more and get shit done during the day. But to be honest, at least in my opinion, it’s depressing. I don’t like being stagnant. I don’t like having zero interaction with people. I don’t like spending my entire day absorbed with nothing but my own thoughts. There are no distractions. There’s nothing to do. I aimlessly meander around. I write with no motivation.

I love my job!  Performing and writing and teaching is awesome.  But sometimes I miss having another outlet. Something to keep my brain busy and distracted. And, most importantly, my bank account happy. Because it’s not very happy at all anymore. No way, no how.

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