This past month (aside from the 4th of July), I have participated in something called Dry July. At first, I just thought July would be a good month for me to stop drinking because there wasn’t much going on and it’d be a relatively easy month to not drink, as opposed to August when I have several guests in town and September when I have a couple of weddings. But apparently, Dry July is a thing. So look at me… being either unoriginal or just as inventive as everyone else!
One of the reasons for doing this is because I realized that I drink basically every day. Whether it’s one drink with dinner, or several drinks on a Friday night, drinking was a big part of my daily life. It’s not a problem, per se, but it’s definitely a habit that I don’t particularly love being a habit.
Last night, I decided to have two glasses of wine while at a bar watching one of Beau’s friends play music. Partly because I have a social anxiety disorder but also because I REALLY WANTED A GLASS OF COLD WHITE WINE, OKAY?
I enjoyed my two glasses of wine. I really, truly did. But you better fucking believe I felt like a piece of shit afterwards. I beat myself up ALL night long. I couldn’t fall asleep because I felt so bad for giving up so easy in one goddamn moment of anxiety-induced weakness.
When I woke up this morning, my body kept the beat down going with a HUGE headache. It was only two glasses of wine! I’ve drank a bottle of wine and not had a headache before! (Sad.) All I know is that I hated that feeling. I hated the guilt and I hated the headache and I also felt pretty fatigued all day as well. So… I guess alcohol really does have a pretty big effect on our bodies. How upsetting is that?
Today, and the rest of the month, I’m going to continue in my non-alcoholic journey (at least through July.) I think afterwards I’ll still cut back because I have not been craving, needing or wanting alcohol with dinner or during any occasion where I’m not celebrating something… or feeling socially anxious.
That being said, I did eat a pretty large amount of gummy sharks today so I don’t know if I’m learning any health-related lesson at all.